The antagonist is a has been writer who seeks relevance again. He finds out about the pen and wants to write his new story. Or, Hollywood style— really bad guys want the pen so they can rule the world. Hehe.
Mid-read, I absolutely googled "Lilly Pulitzer pen" and became equally confused! I kept wanting to highlight different parts of this, but eventually gave up when I realized there are just too many sentences that were literally perfect.
At 31 with three kids, I think I'm in this transition phase where I've mourned some of the unrealized ambitious, flashy dreams I had in my early 20s, but am also realizing that maybe those dreams weren't as worthwhile as I once thought after all. There's something about sipping coffee from my favorite mug when the house is still quiet in the morning, or standing on the back porch with my hands on my hips, looking at the grass. What a post, man.
That line about the pen being carried by someone wearing white gloves reminded me of the world’s most expensive tea. It can only be picked by male virgins wearing white gloves who have never eaten onion or garlic, and only under a full moon. Perhaps the pen is crafted under similar conditions?
It’s real, I saw it on James May: Our Man in India. I forgot to say they only pluck the tips of the tea leaves, not the whole leaves themselves. It costs like $2000/lb. or something!
I found some on Amazon. Also try your local brick and mortar stationery or office supply store. I think, also, Barnes and Noble may have them..I think I saw some in with the planners the last time I was there. Good luck!
My wife has read this piece and offered solutions as well. Apparently my inability to find them may stem from me being what is clinically referred to as a “bad looker” 🤣🤣🤣
Thank YOU Jacqueline! Since the publication of this piece it’s been brought to my attention that we own two other versions of this pen (by my wife 🤣). Now, if only I can find them!!!
Hilarious, Henny. And for what it’s worth, I think you're exactly the appropriate amount of obsessed about finding more of a favorite pen. It’s a goddamn mission.
This article is so fun, funny and honest! I totally relate to the focus on mundane things through maturity and I've googled just as many ridiculous questions. I think it means we've done things right!
Thanks for delivering chuckles ahead of the weekend.😉
BTW, I have a good friend who has been obsessed with good pens since she was 30.
So much fun and so real! Great essay. Carpenters have a favorite tool. They like precision when building something. We writers build things, too, and a great pen is worth the hunt. I go through a lot of pens, too. I'm never satisfied with the brand, the feel, even the words that sometimes pool on the paper from the tip. Pens are a bugger for us writers. Thanks for this essay.
My brother-in-law, a non-writer, used to collect pens. I thought he was a bat-shit loonball for doing so. (He's actually normal, which probably explains why he's a non-writer, but there ya go.) Anyway, after reading about your dream, his hobby is all beginning to make sense. Life may not be all about Grand Revelations; rather it's about simple but profound choices, choices made one day (or even moment) at a time. On that note, expect an essay in the near future about my rather impressive collection of Norwegian paper clips.
By the way, I already called the ASPCA. Pinning an innocent dog to the ceiling with your foot is one thing (though I admire your flexibility), but actually sharing it on Substack ... that's simply over the top.
You are in luck. . .I bought a pack of 3 because they are cute so there are 2 more lurking in our house somewhere! 😉
This is why I love you.
Well, not the only reason, but still.
I love this dream! Funny yet poignant.
It made me think of a story. A writer finds a magical pen. Whatever story he writes comes true.
Shit I like that story Carissa!!
The antagonist is a has been writer who seeks relevance again. He finds out about the pen and wants to write his new story. Or, Hollywood style— really bad guys want the pen so they can rule the world. Hehe.
Mid-read, I absolutely googled "Lilly Pulitzer pen" and became equally confused! I kept wanting to highlight different parts of this, but eventually gave up when I realized there are just too many sentences that were literally perfect.
At 31 with three kids, I think I'm in this transition phase where I've mourned some of the unrealized ambitious, flashy dreams I had in my early 20s, but am also realizing that maybe those dreams weren't as worthwhile as I once thought after all. There's something about sipping coffee from my favorite mug when the house is still quiet in the morning, or standing on the back porch with my hands on my hips, looking at the grass. What a post, man.
Thanks dude! If only I’d have started to smell the roses when I was your age….I wouldn’t be stuck doing it in this decrepit body 🤣🤣🤣
😂😂
That line about the pen being carried by someone wearing white gloves reminded me of the world’s most expensive tea. It can only be picked by male virgins wearing white gloves who have never eaten onion or garlic, and only under a full moon. Perhaps the pen is crafted under similar conditions?
I can’t tell if you’re talking about like a Simpson’s episode or if this is a legit thing???
It’s real, I saw it on James May: Our Man in India. I forgot to say they only pluck the tips of the tea leaves, not the whole leaves themselves. It costs like $2000/lb. or something!
That’s insane
I found some on Amazon. Also try your local brick and mortar stationery or office supply store. I think, also, Barnes and Noble may have them..I think I saw some in with the planners the last time I was there. Good luck!
My wife has read this piece and offered solutions as well. Apparently my inability to find them may stem from me being what is clinically referred to as a “bad looker” 🤣🤣🤣
This may be the best thing you’ve ever written.
Holy smokes! Coming from you that is one of the highest compliments I think I’ve ever received. ❤️👊🏼 Much appreciated!
So funny and relatable, Henny. Always enjoy your work.
Appreciate it Moorea!!!
Absolutely could relate to all you wrote
A good read, thank you 🙏🏻
I am envious that you have that pen! 😁
Thank YOU Jacqueline! Since the publication of this piece it’s been brought to my attention that we own two other versions of this pen (by my wife 🤣). Now, if only I can find them!!!
Hilarious, Henny. And for what it’s worth, I think you're exactly the appropriate amount of obsessed about finding more of a favorite pen. It’s a goddamn mission.
A GODDAMN mission I tell ya!
I totally identify with loving a thing to the point of
craziness. Warning:
get the pens now. 🖤
Hahaha. My wife has assured me I will be receiving some for Father’s Day 🤣🤣
This article is so fun, funny and honest! I totally relate to the focus on mundane things through maturity and I've googled just as many ridiculous questions. I think it means we've done things right!
Thanks for delivering chuckles ahead of the weekend.😉
BTW, I have a good friend who has been obsessed with good pens since she was 30.
This is honestly the first GREAT pen I’ve found. I love pens, especially free ones that are good. But this one is next level 🤣.
The questions we ask our computers could be an article in and of itself!
💯
https://ebay.us/m/1y6xoi
OMG you’re amazing J-9000!!!
Do you have a first name or do you prefer to go by your Terminator call sign? 😉
🤣 I like the Terminator call sign for the light anonymity it provides
I hope you find the pen! Sometimes it’s the little things…
👍🏼👊🏼
Standing ovation. This is fantastic Coach. One of the finest things I have read on Substack.
Wow Tamara, thanks for reading…and for letting me know that. Made my morning!
Seriously, it was terrific. So relatable on so many levels. Inspiring.
Thank you so much, genuinely.
Did you take a picture of this beautiful pen and put it in an AI search😎
Duke you’re a genius!!!
So much fun and so real! Great essay. Carpenters have a favorite tool. They like precision when building something. We writers build things, too, and a great pen is worth the hunt. I go through a lot of pens, too. I'm never satisfied with the brand, the feel, even the words that sometimes pool on the paper from the tip. Pens are a bugger for us writers. Thanks for this essay.
Thank YOU Christine! I know right, we find a great ones so infrequently it makes the special ones that much better!!
My brother-in-law, a non-writer, used to collect pens. I thought he was a bat-shit loonball for doing so. (He's actually normal, which probably explains why he's a non-writer, but there ya go.) Anyway, after reading about your dream, his hobby is all beginning to make sense. Life may not be all about Grand Revelations; rather it's about simple but profound choices, choices made one day (or even moment) at a time. On that note, expect an essay in the near future about my rather impressive collection of Norwegian paper clips.
By the way, I already called the ASPCA. Pinning an innocent dog to the ceiling with your foot is one thing (though I admire your flexibility), but actually sharing it on Substack ... that's simply over the top.