This was a particularly informative and funny edition! I love the diversity of your topics. Oh, and when you do your quarterback issue, don't forget to expound on the reigning MVP. This is a particularly good era for QBs.
Wow! Genghis Khan was quite an imposing figure - kinda’ makes you wonder why there aren’t more young men named Genghis. I don’t think it even cracks the top ten in baby names.
When I was working as a waiter at Red Robin in Anchorage, AK I asked my coworker Jamie what his ethnicity was. (Note: This was in the late ‘90s so that was still a pretty innocuous question.)
He said that he wasn’t 100% sure, but someone in his family had told him that he was “at least a quarter Mongoloid.”
He smiled, so I laughed. Hard. His smile became very confused. I said, “When you tell people this story in the future, don’t say it that way. Say you’re ‘a quarter Mongolian’ from now on.”
Then I explained why he shouldn’t say it that way. Poor guy was extremely embarrassed. “Man, I’ve been telling people that for years! No one said anything!”
I’m not sure if Jamie had a family member who was just a jerk or if he’d screwed it up on his own, but I’m guessing it was the latter. This was the same guy who told me that, as a child, he had thrown a stick at a baby moose and had been subsequently chased, knocked over, and trampled by Mama Moose. If you’ve seen an adult moose in person, you know she deserves those capital “M’s”.
After the attack, he lay on his stomach, half-buried in the snow, for a few minutes. He said he was scared and wanted to run home but he also wanted to be sure Mama Moose was gone. Finally, he dug himself out and booked it through the woods to his house.
When he got home, his mom asked where he’d been and why he was so wet and dirty. He told her. She didn’t believe him- at first. He said: “I swear, mom! Where the moose stepped on my back really hurts.”
His mom was still skeptical, but he was usually an honest kid, so she decided to take a closer look at him just to be sure. She took his coat and sweater and shirt off and told him to turn around.
At this point in the story he paused.
“And?” I said.
With a big grin he said, “Four black hoof print-shaped bruises, all right next to each other! After she knocked me down, Mama Moose jumped into the air and landed on me with all four feet at once! Once my mom saw the hoof prints she took me to the ER. They said I was bruised but nothing was broken. The doc said that the combination of my puffy coat and the give of the snow and branches on the ground must’ve absorbed enough of the impact so that I didn’t die! He told me if it had been summer, I’d be dead for sure!”
Classic Jamie. To this day, he is the only self-professed “quarter-Mongoloid” I’ve ever met.
Alaska is a WILD place, for sure, and not just for the moose and bear (I almost said squirrel).
I was there in the mid-80s and the late-90s and it was a crazy environment both times. No matter the era, being in Alaska means you’re on The Frontier and that lends itself to a wide range of interesting characters.
It's funny because I've been considering buying that book about the Mongols. I saw it recently. I'm fascinated by the old empire because they're the only civilization I choose to play as on Age of Empires 4.
Have you listened to Dan Carlin's Hardcore History podcast series about Genghis Kahn? It's been years since I heard it, but it was a great deep dive.
Also, do you pronounce it "Genghis" or "Jenghis"? The former is much more common, but the latter seems to be the way it would've actually been pronounced.
I have not but will look for it, thanks for the rec. I use the G but I can’t believe what your comment just reminded me of. Brian Reagan does a bit in his stand up on just that (Genghis vs Jenghis). Frigging hilarious. Dammit, wish I’d remembered that when I was writing this piece!
This was a particularly informative and funny edition! I love the diversity of your topics. Oh, and when you do your quarterback issue, don't forget to expound on the reigning MVP. This is a particularly good era for QBs.
I actually have some interesting tidbits about him from Wyoming. Will see if I can crowbar them in 😉
Wow! Genghis Khan was quite an imposing figure - kinda’ makes you wonder why there aren’t more young men named Genghis. I don’t think it even cracks the top ten in baby names.
Genghis Hiemenz couldn’t have been worse than Henny
When I was working as a waiter at Red Robin in Anchorage, AK I asked my coworker Jamie what his ethnicity was. (Note: This was in the late ‘90s so that was still a pretty innocuous question.)
He said that he wasn’t 100% sure, but someone in his family had told him that he was “at least a quarter Mongoloid.”
He smiled, so I laughed. Hard. His smile became very confused. I said, “When you tell people this story in the future, don’t say it that way. Say you’re ‘a quarter Mongolian’ from now on.”
Then I explained why he shouldn’t say it that way. Poor guy was extremely embarrassed. “Man, I’ve been telling people that for years! No one said anything!”
I’m not sure if Jamie had a family member who was just a jerk or if he’d screwed it up on his own, but I’m guessing it was the latter. This was the same guy who told me that, as a child, he had thrown a stick at a baby moose and had been subsequently chased, knocked over, and trampled by Mama Moose. If you’ve seen an adult moose in person, you know she deserves those capital “M’s”.
After the attack, he lay on his stomach, half-buried in the snow, for a few minutes. He said he was scared and wanted to run home but he also wanted to be sure Mama Moose was gone. Finally, he dug himself out and booked it through the woods to his house.
When he got home, his mom asked where he’d been and why he was so wet and dirty. He told her. She didn’t believe him- at first. He said: “I swear, mom! Where the moose stepped on my back really hurts.”
His mom was still skeptical, but he was usually an honest kid, so she decided to take a closer look at him just to be sure. She took his coat and sweater and shirt off and told him to turn around.
At this point in the story he paused.
“And?” I said.
With a big grin he said, “Four black hoof print-shaped bruises, all right next to each other! After she knocked me down, Mama Moose jumped into the air and landed on me with all four feet at once! Once my mom saw the hoof prints she took me to the ER. They said I was bruised but nothing was broken. The doc said that the combination of my puffy coat and the give of the snow and branches on the ground must’ve absorbed enough of the impact so that I didn’t die! He told me if it had been summer, I’d be dead for sure!”
Classic Jamie. To this day, he is the only self-professed “quarter-Mongoloid” I’ve ever met.
Holy shit that’s funny and crazy all at the same time
Alaska is a WILD place, for sure, and not just for the moose and bear (I almost said squirrel).
I was there in the mid-80s and the late-90s and it was a crazy environment both times. No matter the era, being in Alaska means you’re on The Frontier and that lends itself to a wide range of interesting characters.
It's funny because I've been considering buying that book about the Mongols. I saw it recently. I'm fascinated by the old empire because they're the only civilization I choose to play as on Age of Empires 4.
It is fascinating!
Why is history so much more interesting to me as an adult?! I would’ve loved to learn all this way back when.
I feel that way about a lot of stuff. Feels like I’m making up for lost time.
Have you listened to Dan Carlin's Hardcore History podcast series about Genghis Kahn? It's been years since I heard it, but it was a great deep dive.
Also, do you pronounce it "Genghis" or "Jenghis"? The former is much more common, but the latter seems to be the way it would've actually been pronounced.
I have not but will look for it, thanks for the rec. I use the G but I can’t believe what your comment just reminded me of. Brian Reagan does a bit in his stand up on just that (Genghis vs Jenghis). Frigging hilarious. Dammit, wish I’d remembered that when I was writing this piece!
The series is long, but worth a listen if you’re into the topic
2. I remember. Mongoloid.
Riccardo Mantalban! Great photo.
Do you say the name Ricardo Montalban in your head the way I do? I.E. the way he would say it…accent and all? His accent was top shelf.
Yes! He had the best accent.
That was very interesting. And I think we need to go full Maori on Congress, but maybe with the traditional weaponry for full effect
That could get ugly. Those folks don’t f around.
Counting on it